I know it has been awhile

How did this month go by so fast?! I've broken out with a cold sore... ouch. And it is a doozy. It tried to break out a week or so before himiself's party and I kept catching it with Campho-Phenique, but I could feel it really breaking free (so to speak) on Tuesday night at chorus and now it is just gross & disgusting and quite painful.

Aren't you thrilled to hear about it?

Last night himself & I watched "Serenity" and "Wallace & Gromit: Curse of the Were-Rabbit" -- both were fun! Serenity is by Joss Whedon (Buffy creator), who created the "Firefly" tv series that failed, but of course has a cult following. It is a shame it was not picked up, 'cause it has some good stuff in it! And Wallace & Gromit...what's not to like? Gotta buy it.

What else have we been doing? Well -- I've scrapped quite a few pages, both for myself and my client, which is good.

I've had a lunch meeting regarding purchasing a business -- teaching crafts to residents in assisted care homes for $45 an hour. Hello! Crafts! Senior Citizens! Crafts! The lady trying to sell it is one of those genuinely sweet, not-an-unkind-bone-in-her-body person, but she isn't one to be pushed around, either. She and a friend started this business about 8 years ago, her friend sold her share to this lady, and so now she's been doing it for about 7 years on her own, and she's looking to retire. As it is now, she's only working 20 - 25 hours a week every other month because she's been taking a break (she's been searching for someone to buy it for about 2 years now). She has already laid the foundation... marketed herself and the product, she has connections in the community and her market (senior care homes), and has paperwork and structure already in place, and the price is reasonable.

The risk that himself sees is that the business is successful because of this lady. SHE is the force behind the success... it is her personality and life that has built this successful business. And yes, he knows how much the residents at Fellowship Square loved me, and doesn't doubt that I have the potential to be highly successful at this -- but, what if most of these care homes then change their minds about having someone new come in... or after a month decide I'm not working out -- I'm left with a substantial debt/loan and nothing in place to pay it off.

So this week I'm meeting her again and I'll re-introduce the concept that I work for her for a year - she receives $45 an hour, she could pay me $20 and I'm doing all the work -- and then between 6 months and a year I've saved enough money to buy her out, all the while I'm establishing myself as the primary force of the business, but with a cushion of her experience and reputation. We see this as Win Win -- she'll be making $25 an hour really just in an advisory position. And I'm sure it can work out that I'll still be an independent contractor, so she won't have to worry about payroll and stuff like that.

Let's see... what else... we had extra coaching last week with Marcia Massey of Oklahoma City Chorus -- she's super talented... but I was having a huge pity party for myself on the risers. I was hot, tired, my back ached, my feet hurt, the lady who is directly in front of me on ther risers sits on a chair that has a back on it, the lady on my right sometimes forgot to put her elbow down and it was kinda bony, the water bottle in the apron of the gal behind me was in my way... none of those things by itself is a problem -- I'm the fat one who keeps bumping into them, but you know how sometimes nothing you say to yourself helps? I was frustrated because the choreography was being changed as we were going along... then changed, then the rhythms weren't being remembered and so we as a group would start repeating incorrect rhythms, and then we'd get yelled at for it (grrrrrr......) -- and I was still hot, tired, aching back & feet, couldn't put my arms in front of me for bumping into chair lady, couldn't put my arms in back of me for bumping in waterbottle lady.... and I KNEW I was being unreasonable, grumpy, self-centered (gee -- no one else was crowded or tired on the risers... ).

Then there are the things I'm frustrated with that are not appropriate to put out there in cyberspace --

But then I whined and griped and vented and feel better. I get frustrated with myself at times like this because I *know* better, but still *feel* that way -- and am learning I have to get it out... *understanding* something isn't *Getting It* (per Rhonda, Life Coach - lesson to Christie on Starting Over this week) -- Understanding something in my head isn't Really Getting It so that I can make a change of living that way. But I digress.

The bass of my quartet is awesome -- she let me whine for a while... and then yesterday I went to Curves (only made it twice this week, but ya know... this was the 4th week in-a-row(!) that I'd been to work out and while it wasn't perfect, and I gained weight (!!!), I still feel good about it), and saw a gal from chorus also working out, and she and I went and had coffee afterwards for what was essentially 2 1/2 hours!! It was so fun!

Himself and I have talked a lot about moving to the house I grew up in -- we won't know more until we know if he's going to be hired as full time permanent -- but it seems he's having some second thoughts on renting it for awhile until we have a better financial backup. That puts me all in a flutter, so things are just in a state of flux, and I'll have to trust and have faith that things will work out the way they are supposed to. Easier said than done!

Himself was kept back about 15 minutes Friday night after work to be told how great he is doing. His team coach showed him his stats (which the company doesn't really 'go on' as far as rating how an employee is doing, but just to show him that his numbers are going in the right direction), and generally tell him what a star he is. The coach mentioned something about himself needing to teach others his 'Scottish Charm' -- *heh heh - I KNEW it!* -- and that the coach is going to have some people 'Y-in' or 'double-jack' or 'listen in with him' on calls. So himself's feeling really good, and just thankful to be at a company which recognizes and appreciates in tangible ways their good employees.

I'm asking for self-discipline, a change of heart to accomplish the financial goals I've set for myself in order to contribute to our household, and to do all things with a joyful heart.